Why.

What is your why? Why do you do things that way you do them? Why are you willing to face adversity to reach your desired destination in life. These are thoughts I’ve had before when I hear about someone with a big dream that seems to be a bit more than they probably can bite, chew, and swallow. Meaning I’m not sure why they really are doing things the way they are doing, I’m probably not alone in wondering about these things.

As a youth in central Utah, I used to sell corn on the side of the road next to the high school every fall for a few summers. My Father, Grandfather, and I would go pick the corn then we’d park the truck on the side of the street and I’d sit there till the sun went down or I’d sold all my corn for the day. I learned a few interpersonal skills with people and how to sell products to folks which is a benefit to me to this day. One of the most memorable experiences for me was trying to sell a bag of corn to a man carrying a giant cross across the USA who stopped through our little town on his way to California.

I asked him about his cross and why it had a wheel on the bottom. Man, “It’s designed to make the walk easier as I carry it.” Me, “Why are you carrying that thing? Don’t you think it would be faster to leave it behind?” Man, “Yes, it would be easier, but I want to show everyone that I can carry this heavy cross from New York to California.”  Me, “Ummm, okay, but why?” Man, “I told myself if I could do this, I could do anything.” Eight or Nine year old me didn’t get it then but have never forgotten it to this day. This man had a purpose to walk across America with a heavy wooden object, and I hope it helped him see he could do anything. I did, however, sell him some corn to fuel his trek.

To this day I see and hear about people who are setting out for challenging journeys as adventurers, entrepreneurs, athletes, and scholars. I can’t always relate to nor understand their vision for choosing the challenges they have decided to claim. I can confirm that choosing a challenge that people don’t understand can be a catalyst to the greatest adventures of one’s life.

Share your why with others, and enlighten them on your vision. If they doubt you or don’t understand that is okay. They might catch a vision similar to yours one day, and take off on their own journey fueled by nothing more than why.

Speak up.

Speaking up can be a challenge no matter who you are in a uncomfortable situation. The ability to say what you need to when it’s needed to be said is a tactful gift that few have. A few thoughts on sharing the hard truth.

First off, use your words wisely. Say what needs to be said, don’t beat around the bush when delivering the message but be tactful with the way you say it. People may not appreciate you speaking up and saying what needs to be said at first but will respect you for having the gumption to say it.

Second, keep your message simple and filled with the truth. Allowing the discussion to be built around fluff and misinformation can deteriorate the trust you share with the person you are conversing with. Keep the message as lengthy as it needs to be but not too long. Use clear words that communicate the message effectively without question, use strong statements that effectively relay your message without belittling the person you are talking to

Thirdly, be mindful not to back your communication partner into a corner. When giving a hard message it’s essential to deliver a clean message with the intent to help not harm the other person. Giving others clear options will be a safe bet to avoid emotional defense and rebuttal from another. Although you clearly know where you want or need the conversation to go have options for another than can effectively lead them through the desert to the oasis that is your desired resolution.

Is this an easy skill to learn? Not really. Is it a good way to become a better communicator? Yes, say it as it needs to be said, use your words wisely, share the simple truth of your message, and keep the trail ahead open with options that lead your communication partner to a clear understanding of your desired outcome. You’ll fumble a few times until you get the hang of delivering the hard message, but once the message is delivered and you can breathe a sigh of relief it’ll be easier to relay the next time around.

Legacy.

What do you want to be remembered for? Your ability to smile through challenges, kindness towards others when it is needed most, your zest for life? or your work ethic? There are countless things to be known for and remembered by. Each day we are forging experiences that will be used by others to remember us by when they think back on us.

Each of us can look back and remember someone who was a light in the darkness, or a stain on the situation. There are also those who we have forgotten entirely due to the fact that they weren’t key players in the experiences we think back on. These are facts of life we will be remembered for the things we have done, or forgotten entirely by some.

When I think about the legacy others are leaving for me to remember I think warmly of the experiences I’ve had at wrestling tournaments watching my father coach others through successful defeats of their opponents or comfort and coach them through defeats they suffer themselves. My father as a wrestling coach taught me how important it is to show up ready for anything, to be prepared for any outcome, and to recognize the opportunities for growth in any situation.

Being taught how to look at opportunities doesn’t mean that there won’t be hard losses that take some time to work out. However, during these times you can stand tall, recognize the struggle will pass, and you can still look your opponent in the eye and shake their hand knowing that the next match there might be a different outcome.

One thing to remember is these challenges aren’t always against other people, we can agree that some of the hardest matches we will face against are the battles fought within, against ourselves. We are our own challengers more often than most will want to admit. However, there are many who are the strongest, kindest, happiest people we know who’s championships are won without anyone seeing the event happen.

Your legacy can be a variety of many things. Successful businesses, holding public offices, works of art, tales of travel, or being known as a mentally strong person who has balanced many things and smiled through the hardest days. Be confident and know that you are great, you can always do better but today, you’re great as you are your legacy is still being written.

Patience.

Growing up as an impatient child I was often reminded that I needed to learn patience. Why was patience so important to learn? For most of written history, great philosophers and teachers have reminded we the people that we need to practice more patience. That we need to be patient with those around us when we are working together, on opposing sides of a story, driving in traffic, or repeating ourselves for the third time.

We can agree that being patient is a difficult task at times. Patience is difficult because we have times relating to others isn’t easy and their point of view doesn’t make sense to us. Have you ever attempted to explain how to use features of a smartphone, computer, or gaming system to someone who doesn’t catch the idea then continually asks for a repeat of the instructions, not just that day but many times after that?

Are you usually the teacher who reiterates the steps, pauses during a question counts to three and repeats the process over again? Have you ever been the pupil in this scenario and been grateful that your friend or a family member has continued to repeat the instructions to you? It’s a truth that at one point in time you have had to be patient as a teacher and a teacher has had to exercise patience while teaching you.

As a practitioner of endurance activities, patience is key to successful completion of said endurance tasks. The key is understanding that endurance takes time to build up, you have to be ready for the long game of training, enduring through repetition, and thriving in your desired quest for endurance in your desired activity.

The hardest part of endurance is having patience with yourself throughout the process, it hurts, it takes an extended amount of time each day to build up said endurance, and often you are in pain as you are adapting to said endurance ability. Yet, once you arrive at the desired endurance level you are rewarded with the ability you’ve been seeking along with an endless amount of stories to tell from your journey getting here.

With the speed of life, we often live at it is a real challenge to have patience in our day to day routines when the processes are thrown off. When there is a slower person ahead of us on an escalator, or we have to repeat ourselves again to someone we know or someone we don’t. Extending patience is a genuine challenge we should accept for our own personal growth, mental health, and the betterment of society around us. Wouldnt the world be a kinder place if we were all a little more patient.

Relax.

The ocean air blew through my hair that afternoon while I watched the birds fly above me and the waves crash on the cliffside below. I closed my eyes and relied on my senses of hearing, smell, and touch to fully experience that moment just off highway 101 near Aberdeen, WA in 2016. Those moments of simply being in the most relaxed state I had been in months. Simply taking that time to relax and be in that moment healed me for a time.

This was a segway into me being able to recognize that I needed to find a better life balance. Being able to take time to relax was one thing I needed to do. If you are like me you can be a very on the go type of person trying to juggle work, social life, personal life goals and relationships, and so much more.

While we spend so much time juggling these different pieces of us we often fail to take the time to relax, recharge and reset. I’ve mentioned this previously in other posts but I feel that getting time to relax is honestly something more people need to do so they can avoid burnout.

As referenced earlier I have found that taking a few minutes in nature helps me to reset and reassess life. I’ve fallen in love with the outdoors and the open space that is often free of unneeded clutter and seems to have a way to untangle the conflicts of my busy life. I am fortunate to live within minutes of open spaces and the ability to get out and wander my way to physical exercise and mental relaxation. Getting outdoors is a simple way to relax and breathe a bit easier.

There are endless ways to relax, getting outdoors is just my favorite way to do so. Other ways I have found to relax include, reading a book, playing games with friends, cooking dinner, eating dinner, walking around the office at work on a break, and many more. These are my ways to relax, not a comprehensive list, but one I hope makes you look into what is relaxing for you.


If you’re not sure how to relax, just take some time and sit on a park bench and look at your surroundings, focus on experiencing the moment with your basic senses of sight, hearing, smell, taste, and touch. See where you go from there.

Fear.

When you ask my wife what she is most afraid of you’ll hear a number of assorted fears, with a strong emphasis in mice. She hates them enough that I haven’t the words to describe her hate and fear of them. She fears them enough the basic instincts of fight or flight kick in, and she usually aims for the latter. In fact, we are not sleeping at home tonight because of said fear, after seeing a mouse in the house earlier.

I believe there are many out there who can relate to my wife. We all fear one thing or another, at times our fears can cripple us, at other times they can strengthen us and aide us in doing what needs to be done at that time. Please note that I believe that it is okay to be afraid, fear is something I’ve worked through on a very personal level and I recognize that we all view the world from different views.

Many of us can agree that fear is good in a healthy dose, fear of getting a ticket while speeding, or fear of falling while climbing a tree isn’t a bad thing. Finding a balance between adrenaline and fear is a smart balance to find. Not letting fear run your life is the best way to live in peace with what can / could happen any given day. We live a life filled with unknowns, the best thing we can decide is that we will not be afraid of what is coming only to embrace it as it arrives.

I recently read a book by Alex Honold called “Alone on the wall.” where he talks about his mental preparation for some of his larger climbs that have made him famous for being a rock climber who free solos large pitches or climbs on some of the most challenging climbs in the world. He mentions that he can practice the moves needed(while roped in) hundreds of times before the actual climb(without a rope) but still is aware that things might not always go as planned, he has to be mentally ready to shake off the fear and climb onward without fearing what could go wrong. He is well aware of what could go wrong but chooses to focus his energy on what he can do to prepare for things to go the way he needs them to.

This should be a general rule of thumb for everyday life, learning from our experiences and letting them strengthen us for the unknown days ahead instead of spending our days fearing what could go wrong. Be aware that your options are many the outcomes are endless. So find a healthy balance and don’t be afraid to live your very best life.


Change.

What does change mean to you? A change of scenery? A change of pace? Changing your style? Changing the world? Changing yourself? Change is an ever constant companion no matter where you go. It enables us to grow and adapt to the world around us that never sits still.

Recently I’ve seen the #tenyearchallenge all over social media, and it has had me thinking back to ten years ago and how different the world is. The first iPad was introduced in 2010, Snapchat, Instagram, and Pinterest were all still being developed. I used a blackberry primarily for tweeting song lyrics, liking posts on Facebook and playing brick breaker.

My interests were slightly different back then too. I enjoyed the outdoors, as long as it was in the evening or late at night after working on the farm. I enjoyed writing, sappy love songs, and poems for no reason. My fashion choices have improved, and that’s all I want to say about that.  Telling jokes, and sharing moments with friends is just as important to me then as they are now.

Adventure, Business, and happiness were all things I wanted ten years ago too, I have been on many adventures around the world since then, experienced different cultures, and meeting new people who I am blessed to call friends. Worked in startups, knocked doors and learned different branches of business during the past decade. I’ve found happiness in doing the things I enjoy most, in my own way and at my own pace.

Acknowledging that every year will be filled with new changes is a great way to prepare yourself for the unknown. We don’t know what lies ahead for the world we live in, trends come and go faster than we can anticipate. What matters most is that we can adapt as the change comes knowing that we’ll be okay learning as we go.